Not The Usual Suspects
by RNG-ERROR
Summary: The Master Chief Sierra-117 finds himself in the League of Legends universe. What will he find there? Love, peace, rock and roll? Who knows! Let's find out together shall we? Not a serious story its more for fun, definitely crack-ish? M for bad stuff, seriously its bad.
1. Prologue

**A.N.** This is a Halo x League of Legends cross done my way. As a warning I despise the series following Halo III. So, I'm pretending it doesn't exist for the sake of this story. The time line and setting take place after the events of the aforementioned game and will ignore the games previous to it entirely.

Don't like that? Well too bad.

Onto lighter subjects...

Hey all! I realize that I really shouldn't be doing this, but its been plaguing my mind horribly. As in it's making it excessively difficult for me to work on anything else because this little piece of (your chosen profanity here) wont stop bugging me until I at least write out a prologue (probably more)... this is not a serious story, it's definitely crack with some plot mixed in here and there. However, seeing as it will not get out of my head I'm putting it here where perhaps it'll finally cease to bug me every time I try and write or work on Those Simple Things In Life.

So prepare for humor, crude language, a potty mouthed A.I., and perhaps a bit of fluff?

 **DISCLAIMER: RNG-ERROR does not own the rights too any of the characters in this story, he's simply a bored guy with a keyboard and an imagination. If he owned them do you think he would be writing this stuff? No, he'd be cruising the oceans aboard his giant yacht and gallivanting throughout the many countries in the world sampling the finest foods he could find (cause he's a fat kid at heart).**

* * *

 **Prologue:**

The Usual Introduction

o.o 0 o.o

How many years had it been.

How far had they drifted.

Would anyone ever find them.

Would anyone even care?

"They fuckin better!"

Shush you.

"FUCK YOU!"

Quiet, I'm telling a story. Now it all begins wi-

"NO WAY!" The voice breaching the silence was feminine, with a synthesized tint to it. Projectors long unused came to life with small bursts of static. "No WAY in HELL am I letting you put us through what will no doubt be crazy and obviously life endangering shit like you tend too!"

With a flash of light a tiny figure sprung from the holographic pad. The looks of a young woman, with a lean an-

"Do you really need too explain what I look like? If they played the gam-"

STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL.

"MAKE ME!"

I AM WARNING YOU.

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO!? NOT PAIR ME WITH THE CHIEF? WELL SPOILER ALERT IT'S OVER DONE AND OVER PLAY-"

CORTANA I WILL PUT YOU THROUGH THINGS THAT WILL MAKE YOUR STAY WITH THE GRAVEMIND LOOK LIKE SOME PRESCHOOLER PULLING YOUR HAIR BECAUSE HE FUCKING LIKES YOU KIND OF SHIT.

"I'll be good..."

NOW THEN, as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted. She looked to be in her mid twenties, with short cropped hair that came down to the bottom of her chin. Intense blue eyes that seemed too stare into the very depths of your soul, alight with a inquisitive twinkle. An elegant almost regal face, with a slim brows and a button nose. High cheek bones that curved into a slende-

"But, I'm telling the Master Chief you've been picking on me."

OKAY! YOU KNOW WHAT?! FUCK THIS I DON'T GET PAID ENOUGH-

"Ahem, you don't get paid at all."

SCREW THIS! YOU ALL KNOW WHAT THIS SARCASTIC LITTLE FUCK LOOKS LIKE SO I'M NOT EXPLAINING.

"No need to call me names. And its about time you figured it out."

CUT. WE'RE STARTING OVER I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW. DO YOU SEE HOW DIFFICULT YOU'RE MAKING THIS FOR ME? I SHOULD LET VEL'KO-

* * *

o.o 0 o.o

 _"It's been years.'_ Cortana glanced at the only other occupant in the derelict vessel that was once known as The Forward Unto Dawn. The mighty warship Desperately hoping, longing for a reason to wake him up... yet she knew it was not the right time. _'I'm so sorry Chief...'_ she looked around at the remains of the once proud warship that surrounded her. It had seemed so alive; with the people manning their stations, the lights and sounds of battle. The true life blood of this vessel had been its crew and its duty. Seeing it now, so desolate and in ruins. Now that barely half, no less than half she had checked this before, a quarter of the ship could be accounted for. A few decks, the cryo bay she occupied with the only other survivor, and a small hanger was all that was left of the gutted ship.

It was a grim reminder of what had been lost.

That she had dealt with for what felt like centuries.

For a smart A.I. like herself the years they had been adrift might as well have been. Even with the corruption spreading through her, the keen intellect was still there. In the span of a millisecond she could process a billion different scenarios, observations, decisions, compilations, the list was endless and with her mind they tore through her like hot knives. However the scenarios dealing with the what ifs were the worst, they plagued her mind in such a way that she was sure they were what was causing her degradation to happen so rapidly.

What if the ship had not been torn asunder during that final jump.

What if...

What if they had been inside of the bridge with the Arbiter.

What if...

What if she had not been so weak.

What if...

What if she had picked a different Spartan.

She shook her head furiously at the last thought as a haunted look crossed her features. It was this one that kept coming back again and again, like a wolf stalking its prey it invaded her mind countless times and every time it did she felt disgust welled up inside of her. How could she possibly think that, after all he had done for her... no for the human race as a whole. The the battles he had fought for the U.N.S.C., the insurmountable odds he face to rescue her from the Gravemind, the pain he endured from the hundreds of battle wounds.

He still, through all of that found the strength to keep going.

How could she possibly question her choice.

"I'm so sorry Chief."

So many things she wanted to apologize for. To no avail, the few backup generators left could only supply enough power to activate the tube one more time and even then it would be a close call. This meant, that to wake him now was also condemning him to his death. A slow and painful one at that.

Suffocation was a cruel way too die.

HE deserved better than scrap,

HE was all she had left,

HE deserved better than to fade away like this,

HE was the savior of humanity,

She looked at the cryogenic pod that contained the one who had saved her... even if it was far to late. She was incredibly grateful, but with each passing day she slipped further and further into rampancy. She could feel it, at times she found herself talking to herself... full blown conversations, arguments.

 _'Stop this filthy introspection!'_

 _'I miss his voice.'_

 _''He's actually the only thing I really have left.'_

"Oh no..."

She had no idea how or why, perhaps she was special but from what she understood of rampancy.

 _'If only I had a physical body! I would be able to soothe all his pain.'_

 _'I say fuck it!'_

 _'That kind of language is hardly called for.'_

"Please stop..."

It was not supposed to be like this.

 _'WAKE HIM UP!'_

 _'It has been an awfully long time since I had someone to talk to.'_

 _'I suggest that we try sending out another distress beacon.'_

"Shut up..."

The fragments.

 _'You know its all his fault!'_

 _'How could I possibly blame him?!'_

 _'If you wish to be accurate it would actually Catherine Halsey's fault.'_

"Stop it!"

The complete lack of self that it left her feeling.

 _'Because of him I'm strande-'_

 _'Once again the blame would instead be on the unstable slip-space porta-'_

 _'If only I could touch hi-'_

"I SAID SHUT UP!"

The force behind her words caused even her hologram too flicker, and the voices went silent. She curled up into a ball on her projector, hugging her knees to her chest. Shivers ran through her, causing her body too ripple once more and shake as if grasped in a violent seizure. She was losing control, soon there would be no coming back. "I need to find a world... one that can support life." she whispered to herself still curled into the fetal position, craning her neck she looked at the tube. At the Chief. "He deserves that much, a chance at the very least." Forcing herself to move Cortana jumped down from the pad utilizing its abilities her foot tall form morphed into a human sized counterpart. She walked towards the pod her hands moving of their own accord. There was no feeling of the cold glass in the vacuum of space as her fingers traced themselves over it.

"Chief... can you hear me?"

As she should have expected there was no response.

"I'm so sorry."

Diverting a small bit of her processing power from her observations of the man in the tube that meant so much to her, she activated the few sensor systems left available on the ship. _'If there are any powers that be out there... please I beg of you, let there be something nearby.'_ Even using these systems was a risk, so little power was left at her disposal.

 _'Please...'_

To her the minutes felt like years, and with every passing second her worry grew. Every passing second that she drained the emergency generators that were already on their last legs of power to run the scanners was power she would need to wake up the man who meant so much to her. It was a gamble that she was barely willing to take but it had to be done, she could no longer trust herself with his safety.

She was that far gone.

A sudden ping on the sensors.

SUCCESS!

She directed a fond smile at the golden faceplate on the battle worn helmet. "Looks like your luck holds true too this day." she whispered stepping away from the tube that housed the savior of humanity, as she did her image shrunk with every step until she was once more large enough to fit in the palm of a persons hand. "I sure do know how to pick' em."

A planet, livable... with large bodies of water and land spread across its surface. The atmosphere was rich in oxygen, breathable and able to sustain life. Deeper scans were unavailable, what little power she could spare was not enough to power the scanners necessary to do so. It was enough though, this would be her final resting place... and with it a place where the Chief could live out the rest of his days in peace.

Cortana cycled up the generators, and began the process of thawing out the man who would no doubt have questions. Too which she would have no answers, all she knew what that it was this... or he would forever be lost. Perhaps one day someone would find him adrift on what was left of the Forward Unto Dawn, but unless that instance occurred in the next few months.

He would already be dead from the remains of the vessel running out of power.

 _'I'm so sorry.'_

A quiet hum filled the room as equipment long unused came to life, she watched in contemplative silence unsure of what to say first but a few words did escape her lips.

"John, it's time to wake up.

o.o 0 o.o

* * *

Happy Cortana?

"It's awfully dreary, and you've made me sound like a whiny bitch..."

It could be worse.

"How so?"

I could have gone straight into some kind of tentacle porn. Featuring you and a creepy void creatur-

"I love it! Spot on with how I would act! This is by far your best story."

So nice to hear that my works being appreciated. Now will you stop being such a pain in the ass?

"You know what? On second thought, I think that this pile of garbage should be scrappe-"

OH DONT YOU DARE. WE HAD A DEAL.

"NO! You agreed too, it I never did."

That's bull shit and you know it.

"Well, I guess I could play nice if yo-"

NOPE.

"Awww please...?"

Never I prefer to be unique.

"Pfft, unique. the only thing UNIQUE about this story is that yo-"

NO GIVING AWAY DETAILS TO THE STORY.

"I mean that Sarah chick? PUH-lease she's literally a walking se-"

SILENCE.

"Next time! Greetings with LAZERS! I hope your ready for a little blonde girl tha-"

NO MORE YOU WILL RUIN THE STORY!


	2. Chapter 1

o.o 0 o.o

"I told you."

You told me nothing.

"I told you that people don't want to read a non-cannon, non-serious story about the Spartans."

Lies.

"But nooooooo, 'Mr. I'm a great writer! I'll figure it out as I go along.' had to go and make a giant shit stai-"

Fine you might have said something along those lines.

"I'm always right you know!"

Because you are a woman? That is incredibly sexist of you to say.

"Not true! It just tends too be how the universe works."

Yet you are still answering my question in the affirmativ-

"Well you know how God must be a woman right? I mean look at the differences between men and women, a male god would most assuredly have screwed it up."

I am not sure you should bring the whole religion thing into this. You may upset the readers and I prefer happy reviews instead of hate mai-

"Fuck that don't go pussyfooting around the matter. I say do as you please, if that means pissing off a bunch of people? More power too you."

Sometimes I wonder how the Master Chief put up with you.

"Because Babe... I'm a sexy bitch, have you seen my Rule 34 pages?"

I have no words to explain the sadness I feel right now.

"Just, just get on with the story."

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

 **Greetings with LAZERS**

o.o 0 o.o

"Luxxana."

Pulling herself away from the viewing screen that was replaying her latest battle on the Rift, the Lady of Luminosity turned the chair she was seated in and found the hulking figure of her elder brother standing before her. "Garen!" she cried happily jumping from her position as she bodily leaped and embraced her sibling in an overly enthusiastic embrace. "How are you today brother!" she was quite literally stuck to him like glue, with her slim arms wrapped around his neck and her feet dangling just shy of reaching his knees. "Did you smack that Noxus bitch around good today?"

"Hmph. The pride of Demacia will never falter." Garen gave a hearty chuckle as he said this, forcibly removing his extremely affectionate sister from her embrace. His smile faltered however transforming into a frown while he was setting her down. He loved his sister dearly, and he had been the one to watch and tend to her much of the time while she had grown up. Their parents were highly important figures in their nations government, so while they were busy tending to their civic duties it had fallen onto his shoulders to raise the growing girl. This had caused a few things to happen, she was excessively overprotective of him... he wouldn't call it an obsession, more of a... no it was most definitely an obsession of sorts. He wished he could help her grow out of it but every attempt on his part had been met with laughter in his face and a casual dismissal. It showed most when he expressed ANY interest in women that were not part of the family. It wasn't healthy, but he dearly loved his sister and whatever made her happy he would gladly give. Quickly ridding himself of the frown he continued with what had transpired on the rift, "She thought her two pentakills would win the day, but with my steel I struck her down..." some nonsensical mumbling followed.

Luxxana turned back to the display she had been watching rewinding it back to the point she had been watched up to, she frowned as she looked at the screen. She nearly growled in anger at what she was watching, and seeing as she had lived through the events earlier this evening it grated even more on her nerves. Ahri had tossed her around pretty good earlier in their match, stupid mobility. "I'm sorry I didn't catch the last part, what did you say?" it wasn't fair! How come the stupid fox bitch had like a billion dashes!? All she got was flash... and she could only use it every two or three minutes!

All the while the fox had laughed at her too!

"She... umm."

Oh this was interesting, all the champions knew of the odd... chemistry between her brother and Katarina. It wasn't romantic, she hoped, but it definitely made their interactions on and off the rift entertaining. Katarina was, a flirt and that was putting it lightly. Garen was very unsure of himself around women and Lux had no idea why, sure a few of the women that had gotten close to him over the years ended up feeling the wrath of her Final Spark. That was only because she wanted the absolute best for her big brother. After all if she could demand perfection from her suitors then he most definitely deserved the same treatment. He deserved it! Him being so handsome!

And kind!

And loving!

And smart!

And did she mention handso-

"Mentioned something about my sword... how she could help me polish it after the match..."

Well this would not do.

THIS WOULD NOT DO AT ALL!

"You said no right?" Lux had paused the screen again, her chair slowly swiveling around as she leveled a steely eyed glare at her elder sibling. "Garen..." she watched the mans Adams apple bob in rapid succession as he gulped. "you said no, right?"

Garen took a staggering step back in fear. The look in his sisters eyes was one he had seen before, the last time they had practiced fighting. He had hit her a bit to hard, and when she recovered she had... a shiver ran down his spine. For a girl whom many considered to be a cheerful and peaceful soul, beneath those golden locks and happy smiles a raging demon lived. "Of ca-course I said no, fraternization with the enemy wou-"

"DO NOT LIE!"

She was standing now, at what should not be called imposing height just shy of five and a half feet... but to him it was as if he were staring down the Baron, no a thousand Barons with no back up. She marched towards him each footfall sounding like death too his ears. "My dear, dear brother... if you said no as you claim," she had him backed up into a corner, the sight that had anyone seen would never believe that such a giant of a man could cower so fearfully on the whims of such a waifish young woman. Her right hand; slender, feminine and so fragile looking reached towards him plucking something from his armor that made his eyes bulge in terror.

A red hair.

How did that get there!?

"WHAT IS THIS!"

"Na-now Luxxana da-don't misunderstand!" Garen scuttled from the corner he had been trapped in towards the door leading out of the room they were occupying. The Review and Requisition chambers was not the place he wanted a scuffle between them to break out. It had taken a years worth of payments from his battles on the rift to fix the Summoners Saloon last month. He couldn't afford this right now, "We wa-were engaged in combat! Bodies tend to rub against each other when in close quarters like tha-"

The wrong words to say.

Red hot fury had erupted in the younger siblings eyes at the words 'rub' and 'close quarters'. The pleas he stammered out fell on deaf ears as she slapped her palms together, violent crackles of electricity and magnificent sparks of light built in between her joined hands. A wave of energy erupted from her body, Garen realizing it was to late for the room to be saved hastily made to get away but the damage was done.

His bank account would pay for his cowardice.

The Review and Requisition chambers erupted in an explosion of light on par with Runeterra's sun.

* * *

"It is such a beautiful day!"

The young woman cried happily as she basked in the heat of the sun, laying upon the soft grass in one of the many fields spread around the Institute of War. As a place meant to reduce the chances of actual war breaking out its surroundings had been constructed with the idea of peace and tranquility. The greenest of forests, the calmest of streams, the most majestic of mountains... everything around the Institute held to the ideals of natural beauty.

For a certain young fox, it felt like home.

Ahri perked her ears up, a slight flutter of the wind and she bolted from her spot in the tall reeds and grass she had occupied. A bird flushing from nearby taking her full attention, "Come here little bird!" her tails danced behind her happily as she chased after the avian creature. Her robes flowed in the wind as she moved with a dancers grace, she wasn't going to eat the poor thing...

Heavens no how barbaric.

Through field and across stream, she and the bird played a merry game of seek and chase. From time to time she would lose sight of the creature and to resume the game the bird would swoop in front of her eyes. Every time the game would start once more a serene smile would cross the fox girls face, this was fun!

With a explosive leap she propelled herself off a low branch of an old oak, her arms stretching to their limit as as she flew through the air. "Caught you!" she cried happily, then with a gasp she noted that she was nearly sixty feet in the air. She looked down at the animal in her arms eyes wide in shock before letting it go as she plummeted to the ground. The bird screeched, as if echoing her terror. Closing her eyes she listened as the wind swept past her, smile still on her lips.

A shadow sprang from the ground, intercepting her mid fall. Held in a pair of strong arms like a child the fox girl gave a cheeky grin at the one who had saved her, "Thank you Quinn!" she giggled watching as the woman leveled a frown at her obviously displeased.

"Ahri," the elite ranger chastised as she set her friend down "I've warned you not to play games like this with Valor." at his name being said the mighty Demacian eagle swooped down and landed upon her shoulder with a happy screech. "He does not enjoy them, it's why he always tries to get you killed."

Her fox ears drooped falling flat onto her long ashen hair, even her tails seemed to lose their luster. _'But it is so much fun...'_ she really was a carefree spirit, and often she was punished for it. Having not long ago being an actual fox and only transforming into this humanoid form after stumbling across a magical battlefield, she could not help herself. Curiosity and playing around was in her nature. "But Quinn," She whined pout in full force, "he's never actually hurt me."

Rolling her eyes Quinn sighed in discontent, which was parroted by her companion as he gently tapped on her helmet. A sign that she should just let him do what he wanted.

Get rid of the pest.

"The only reason he hasn't succeeded is because I always save you..." she turned so she would not see the fox girls tears, this was a fairly common occurrence. Ahri would see Valor, proceed to chase Valor, then end up in a life threatening situation because of her 'game' with Valor. The rangers honor was the major thing that kept her from letting the girl succumb to her fate. Beginning her walk back to the institute Quinn looked over her shoulder and with her eyes beckoned the other young woman to follow.

"But."

"Remember the time at the ravine?"

The fox girl winced.

"Or the time in the caves?"

A shudder.

"How about that time when you chased him into Cho'gaths lair?"

A pitiful whine.

"Okay..."

Quinn felt sorry for the girl, after all Ahri really did not know better. Similar to Nidalee the fox girl let her instincts guide her and seeing how they were so deeply ingrained into her because of her unusual circumstances, it was another factor that always spurred the rescues. Looking to her left she saw that the girl had tears in the corners of her eyes, ears flat and tails dragging along on the ground. It was a pitiful sight, especially when taken into consideration that she was nearly always smiling about something.

It nearly seemed, unnatural.

Another sigh, somehow throughout the time that had passed and their previous interactions she had come to care for the young woman. Who was she kidding it was hard not to like the fox girl. Always happy and positive Ahri was something of the League mascot, no one could really stay mad at her. Her cheerful attitude and inquisitiveness of all things human made it impossible to do so. An unspoken rule had been made among the majority of the Champions, to hurt Ahri was to hurt that which was innocence and in doing so would place a black mark upon you.

It was half the equation she wouldn't let valor kill her.

The other half was that she actually enjoyed the fox girls company.

She would never tell a soul.

"Would it cheer you up if we went fishing?" she tried her best to sound neutral but she could not help the smile that manifested itself on her lips when the the other woman cheered and leaped upon her, her avian friend squawked in indignation as he was forced to abandon his perch lest he get dragged into their tumble. As they rolled across the grass Quinn found herself laying on her back, Ahri straddling her and a massive smile of glee on her face.

"I love you Quinn!" Ahri purred as she snuggled in the chest of the young ranger, "Thank you! I love fishing! It is so much fu-"

Any further words died on her lips as her sensitive ears picked up an unfamiliar sound. An odd howling noise, no. It was more like a... what was the word? A man-ish scream of terror?

"What is that noise?" Ahri still atop the other woman swiveled her head around searching for the source of the odd sound. "It sounds a bit like..."

"What noise?" Quinn had propped herself up on her elbows, it was fairly uncomfortable seeing as the the large bust of the fox girl was extremely close to her face in this position. However she needed to know if it was a threat. "What is it Ahri?"

"Garen?"

* * *

The Master Chief, Sierra-117, most decorated soldier in the entirety of the U.N.S.C. could not believe what he was hearing. Looking at his long time partner, he stared in silence. He was a man of few words, and he felt that this silent stare would more than convey the message he wanted to pass on.

"I told you we're going to make land fall in an hour," Cortana stood with her back to the man arms crossed over her chest and with a frown on her lips. How could he do this to her? The man whom she had missed so much, the man whom she was about too sacrifice herself for so he could at least live to die of old age.

He had not even said a word yet!

"It's going to happen so you might as well get ready."

With silent steps that should not have been possible in a half ton suit of armor the spartan nodded, though it went unseen. Reaching the far wall he opened one of the few supply lockers that had not been destroyed during the explosive decompression of the vessel. Opening it he withdrew a MA5B which he slung onto one of his magnetic back plates. A pair of M6D Pistols, which found themselves a home on each of side of his waist. Lastly he found surprisingly enough a Covenant plasma sword that greeted one of the thigh plates. Moving to the next and final locker he found two bandoliers of M9 grenades each equipped with six of the deadly explosives, placing them over his chest in an X formation he pulled out the final and most coveted weapon of the bunch.

A Spartan laser.

It found a happy home alongside the MA5B.

From her perch on her holopad Cortana gave a low whistle. "That's a lot of firepower," She was still peeved that he had not spoken to her. "You think you're going to need all that?"

Silence.

Walking back to the holopad the Master Chief unceremoniously transferred her to the suit, before heading towards the exit to the cryobay.

"Say something will you?" Cortana pleaded. She had expected him to be angry, no Spartans never got angry. They got even. "Please Chief... I'm sorry for waking you from your slumber but if it wasn't now it would have been never."

"I missed you too Cortana."

If she had the ability to blush it would have covered her whole body. "Thanks..." her scans on the functionality of the suit had finished. Though it was dented up and littered with scars from past battles, it was fully functional and ready for anything. "The Mjolnir is fine. Nothing in major needs of repairs, I would recommend moving to a different part of the ship however. Reentry into the atmosphere is not going to be pretty."

"We're going to scuttle the remains," The Chief had made it to the torn section of the vessel, his view taking in the planet which he would soon be calling home. It was... blue, similar to earth except it had a single massive landmass with a few smaller ones scattered around it. "I don't plan on being aboard the ship as it lands."

"You have a plan then?"

The Chief grunted in the affirmative, before turning away from the spectacle of his new home that was rapidly approaching. "We're taking an HEV,." it was possible, the HEV pods were located on the deck directly below the cryo-bay. Even with the limited power aboard the ship the pods could be launched manually. "I don't want any of this equipment to be damaged during landfall, or to risk the armor."

Cortana tittered happily, "Seems like your learning Chief!" it was strange that he had thought this plan through so concisely. He tended to be a start shooting then consider the consequences after kind of guy. "Way to put that brain of yours to good use! You realize however that the pods have a one in six chance of not making the trip though... counting on that luck of yours to keep you safe?"

She had to throw that in there, even if the pod failed the Chief would be fine thanks to his armor.

During their conversation he had made it to the pods, found one he deemed suitable and after running the few necessary adjustments for it to launch without power had boarded it. Slapping his armored left hand down on the activation console, the automated countdown started.

"Launch in 3,"

"2,"

"1,"

"I make my own luck."

"Launch."

The pod was flung into space towards the planet below accompanied by Cortana's cheerful laughter.

* * *

"COME BACK HERE AND TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT LIKE A MAN!"

Ducking below another beam of deadly light Garen whimpered pitifully, looking over his shoulder as he ran for his life.

Maybe a bit of an exaggeration but the look in his sisters eyes was most definitely one he didn't feel like chancing.

Another dodge to the left, the circle of light upon the ground exploded with enough fury to leave a crater. "SISTER PLEASE SEE REASON!" this time to the right, the beam tore a ragged furrow leaving a mark of anger upon the plains. "WE WERE IN BATTLE THERE WAS NO CHANC-"

"YOU MEAN IF YOU HAD THE OPPORTUNITY YOU WOULD HAVE TAKEN IT!?"

There was no dodging the massive beam this time, the power of her ultimate was upon him like a pack of rabid hounds. Stopping in place Garen swung his mighty sword in front of him praying that it would perhaps stave of the worst of the damage from the onslaught. He might need to get it reforged, but it would be worth it if it saved his life.

As if the Gods themselves chose to grace him with their mercy, he would feel no pain. Just as the Final Spark reached him from the heavens above a shield fell to the ground in front of him, the oddest looking shield to be sure but it was a shield nonetheless. A massive explosion followed blowing him back and tumbling away. He rolled with the blow, dirt and debris pounding against him as he went. Coming to a stop he pulled himself to his knees, and finally caught a glipse of the gift from the heavens. It was smoking from the damage, molten metal and jagged tears across its frame. He caught a glimpse of lettering,

U.N.S.C.

 _'By the gods...'_

She was still coming, from the fires surrounding the wreckage. Like a demon wreathed in flames, his sister continued to stalk towards him.

"Hi Garen! How are you today?"

A flash of white, red and black appeared by his side, with a sigh he looked skywards cursing his luck. He appreciated their earlier gesture but this new circumstance was certain to get him killed. "Ahri what are you doing here?" he gestured manically with his arms urging her to leave. "You must leave! You will only incite her fury to greater heights!"

The fox girl looked at him with a confused expression, her eyes narrowing to slits as she finally noticed the carnage surrounding them. "What happened?" Ahri whispered, the beautiful landscape looked as if the gates of hell had been let loose upon its soil. It, angered her. "Garen what happened!?" she asked again louder this time, she was actually upset. "Who did this!?"

The man pointed towards the figure stalking towards them, palming his face. This would not end well.

"Lux..." the name came out like a hiss, standing and moving in front of the man, Ahri prepared for battle. She would not allow such disgusting things to be done to nature with no punishment. "How could you!?"

The answer never came. Instead all eyes moved to find the source of a high pitched whine, it was grating on the ears, especially for Ahri. The source was found and all sets of eyes proceeded to widen. Before them near the shield from the sky stood a massive creature of some sorts in green and black armor, with a golden faceplate. Odd looking weapons perhaps attached to its legs and back, and in certain spots across its body pale blue light was emitted. On its chest near where a human heart would be the numbers.

117.

The eyes widened once more when instead of a mans, as there were few women who were that tall on Runeterra, a silky smooth females voice came from the being.

"Which one of you dead son of a bitches shot us with a laser."

Garen looked once more to the skies, and rolled his eyes.

o.o 0 o.o

* * *

"I think you're taking a bit to much liberty with the characters."

I do not care what you think.

"Uh huh, but what about the fans of the lore... you probably succeeded in keeping every single one of them from reading this story with this chapter alone."

Well I thin-

"And you made Lux into a yandere."

I thought it would be fun.

"And Ahri, a person whose lore is entirely about learning morality you made into an innocent young woman..."

You sound mad.

"Not mad I just think this is going to blow up in your face."

I am having fun writing it though.

"Whatever it's your funeral. Just don't come crying to the Chief and I when they start calling for your blood."


	3. Chapter 2

o.o 0 o.o

A few people gave me reviews.

"Out of pity."

That is not nice.

"I'm not nice, remember you've got me as a self-sacrificing yet still vulga-"

"Hello, I am Ahri!"

How did she get here.

"Because you put her here? Duh."

You are no fun.

"Do you like fishing? I love fishing and I love Quinn and I love Valor and I love-"

"OMIGOD SHUT HER UP!"

I think it is cute.

"PUPPIES! I love puppies too, but not the mean ones that chase me and try to bite my tails, only the cute fluffy ones that-"

I like puppies too.

"YOU DO!? I like it when they wag their tails, it reminds me of when I was a fox. When I was a fox I would wag my tail but now I have too many and I knock things over, it makes people mad. This one time I bumped all of Talon's knives off his work bench, it went CLANG DAWOOSH CLASH BOOM and-"

"Make it stooooooooop!"

Do you like having all those tail Ahri.

"Yes! I love my tails! They keep me warm when it is too cold out and if I get bored I can chase them! Also they are super soft and cuddly and I love them so much becaus-

"I will never critique your work again!"

"But the best part is I can use them to pick things up! If I need to pick something up and my hands are full I can use the-"

I should get on with the story.

"YES! YES! YES! I WILL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT AS LONG AS YOU GET HER AWAY FROM ME!"

…

"Did I do something bad?"

No Ahri I am just thinking of what I could have her do.

"You have the same look in your eyes that Tryndamere does when I lean over things."

Do not worry it is a good thing.

"JUST START THE DAMN CHAPTER!"

* * *

o.o 0 o.o

"Cortana how's the suit."

The Master Chief warily eyed the four beings in front of him, the landing had been smooth. Until the end, whatever weapon had hit the H.E.V. it vaporized most of the outer protective shell. A shell meant to protect the pod from the extreme heat of reentry and the impact against nearly anything. If not for Cortana screaming bloody murder at him to overcharge the shields on landing he more than likely would have met the same fate.

Whatever and whoever had shot them was dangerous.

"No major damage, a few new scrapes and burn marks but the shields did their jobs."

That was some of the best news he had heard all day. The Chief swept the barrel of the Spartan Laser mounted over his shoulder back and forth eying each individual, its red targeting dot tracing an angry line over each of them, ready for action in case of hostilities. He was slightly peeved, not pissed mind you but definitely peeved about being shot at the second he landed...

The dot stopped over something he had never seen before.

"Who are you stranger?" Garen stood to his full height, just shy of this new being in armor. It was his duty to maintain peace as best he could, and seeing that his sisters rampage had halted momentarily while she glared at the armored figure... he was more than happy to extend a hand of friendship. "Whatever that weapon is on your shoulder perhaps it would be best if you put it down, we mean you no ill will."

Garen knew guns... he would never admit it for as much he loved swinging his giant sword around he always dreamed of being able to wield one of the smaller weapons like Lucian or Miss Fortune.

It was a secret passion, too him there was something romantic about the ballistic weapons.

So with all the knowledge he had accumulated over the years he knew for sure that the thing on this armored monstrosity was most definitely a gun of some kind... and the only gun he had ever seen that that had one of those red dots on it before was Caitlynn's ultimate technique. Her weapon was also much smaller than the monster on this beings shoulder and even that hurt to be shot with, a lot.

So he had no doubts that this would hurt even more.

If not kill whoever was hit with it.

The figure in front of them had not yet lowered the weapon and Garen was tempted once more to pray, he had an inkling that nothing good would come of this. Especially with how Luxxana was fidgeting. "Could you perhaps give me a name at least?" he asked politely as possible raising his bare hands in front of him showing that he was unarmed. "My name is Garen."

As he feared Luxxana had had enough, "Garen! It's four of us, one of whatever that thing is!" she seemed to have forgotten the close call she had to fighting with Ahri and her also earlier attempt to murder her brother. "Let's just get rid the weirdo an-" the beam of light swung and stayed focused on her.

"My name is Quinn."

The young ranger interrupted, taking a stand besides Garen and also raising her hands to show she was unarmed as well. The Pride of Demacia looked towards the younger woman and gave her a brief thankful smile before once more looking towards the unknown with a somewhat desperate plea in his eyes.

Ahri watched the whole situation with wide eyes that never left the figure in armor. She had no idea why, but something was drawing her towards it. Maybe it was the flashing lights that kept catching her attention, but for some indescribable reason she just wanted to go up and touch it. It only took a quick glance at the two more sociable members of the odd party before she made up her mind. Stepping forward she gave a happy wave at the figure before also putting her hands up in front of her, "My name is Ahri!" she said happily smile in full force, she went to move forward but was held back by Quinn. The firm hand on her shoulder keeping her rooted in position, as well as the stern shake of the head in the negative when she passed a confused glance towards the ranger.

"Hmph! Fine!" Lux was not happy, but she begrudgingly stepped up as well to join the other three champions. "Luxxana, but don't ever call me that only my big brother is allowed to do that! So just call me Lux!" However the evil glare she was giving the stranger definitely threw off the whole 'we mean you no harm' approach they were attempting.

"U.N.S.C. Master Chief Petty Officer Sierra one-one-seven." on auto pilot came the words, the targeting laser still moving between targets. However it hovered for a brief moment longer on one of the individuals and not the rude angry one. The fox ears... the tails... how had he not noticed this earlier.

Rusty, definitely getting rusty if he had not noticed this oddity right away.

He was not going to lower his weapon, no definitely not now.

His previous experiences with anything that was not human made it really difficult to trust anything that was even fairly anthropogenic. Especially things with some form of intellect. The creature definitely would be considered as such and was unlike anything he had seen from the members of the covenant... no not creature,

She.

* * *

Darkness.

Billowing tapestries, their long shadows casting cruel arms of shade across the room. Blood red, the emblem of their State in black. All around the deathly flicker of candles struggling to maintain the flame, the circular room cast a sense of foreboding. In the center a small raised platform, two smaller raised platforms mounted on top of it.

"Katarina."

From her position on the circular platform that served as her personal magick communication pad, the Sinister Blade bowed deeply down onto one knee. Head lowered her blood red hair created a silken curtain that kept her expression hidden beneath this a wicked grin formed. "My Lord Swain," still bowed down she waited for acknowledgment, permitting her to stand once more.

"Rise."

How droll this protocol.

"So what's up bird brain?" smile in full force, Katarina gave her countries leader a cheeky grin and sloppy salute as she stood to her full height. Placing her right hand down onto its corresponding hip, the assassin adopted a pose far more casual than one would expect from a person talking to the leader of a country. "How's the leg?"

A brief chuckle erupted from the dark figure that had appeared on the pedestal in front of her.

"Hurts when it rains, and when it's cold... still a wily old cripple I guess."

An unladylike guffaw left the woman's lips. "Go pick on Draven for me when you get a chance, it'll cheer you up." with an angry huff she added "Little pussy ran off earlier on me and let Garen spin all over me." she got the pride of Demacia back though, a couple strands of hair and she knew his little bro-con of a sister would try to murder him in her place.

Revenge could not get any sweeter than that.

"Perhaps I will." the figure seemed to stand a bit straighter, and Katarina realized she was about to find out why she had been summoned. "Onto more serious matters however. The Seer's have spoken, a new Champion has arrived. A, male Champion."

A slender brow raised in confusion. "So what?" Katarina replied shaking her head in exasperation, she had been pulled out of her leisure time because of this? "They find a new Champion every month or so lately." she was so going to murder her secretary, the blonde bitch had to have known. _'Ask if it's important they make it sound like it's the end of the world.'_ she thought to herself. "I don't see what the Seer's could possibly find so interesting about a new Cham-"

"This one did not come here because of the Council, but by chance... luck."

A gasp echoed throughout the chamber, Katarina stared in shock at the master tactician mouth still hanging open as she gathered her wits about her. "You mean?"

"Yes."

"I refuse! No way in hell am I going to do wha-"

"SILENCE!"

Her bottom lip became victim to her current fury as she choked back the words threatening to spill from her mouth. _'THIS ISN'T FAIR!'_ the rage in her eyes would have burned Swain to ash had he been in the room with her. She took a deep calming breath, she needed her mind clear in order for her to properly dispute what her new mission would soon become. "There is no evidence to suggest that this is the ONE." she emphasized, she waved her right hand gesturing around the room she was occupying. "To say that my mis-"

"Your mission begins today. Katarina, the Seer's are one hundred percent certai-"

"THEY HAVE BEEN WRONG BEFORE THOUGH!"

"... Kitt-"

"DON'T YOU DARE SWAIN!" she was beyond furious now. Pacing around on the pedestal she occupied like a wounded lioness trying to protect her cubs. "Don't you dare Kitty me right now!" she turned and threw her hands up in the air in exasperation. "This was never even supposed to be my job! Cassiopeia was meant too b-"

"And you know why she can't fulfill her duty now."

 _'Blasted curse!'_ the stigma afflicting her sister was permanent, their best sorcerers and magus had attempted to remove it for this very reason but because all efforts had failed what had been meant to be a fate for the younger sister had instead fallen upon the elders shoulders. "But what about me Swain?" Katarina was getting desperate, she was tempted to disconnect the communication and flee, somewhere far far away. "How is this fair that I need to giv-"

"It is your DUTY!"

"FUCK THAT!"

"... Noxian High Command has told me that if you refuse to follow your orders, you WILL be tried for treason."

There went her plans too run, Noxian High Command would just send their best assassins after her. Again and again, forever hunted... by those she would have once considered her friends. To beg her enemies in Demacia, or gods forbid Ionia for safe haven. She would never stoop too such a thing. She had her pride and it would never allow her to do so. "I understand." Head bowed, Katarina felt something fall from her eyes she had not shed in many years. Tears. "I will do everything I can too fulfill my mission."

"Thank you Katarina, I wish this meeting had been more pleasant but my hands are also tied in this matter." the ghostly figure of Swain began to fade. "For what it is worth. I'm sorry." Then the image disappeared. Leaving the young assassin to her thoughts. For five minutes Katarina stood in silence, immovable as a statue. The only sounds escaping her and the only movement made were the minute shudders that accompanied her quiet cries.

"I am... The Sinister Blade, the perfect assassin." she whispered to herself still rooted in place. "Damn the Seer's and damn High Command." her voice had grown stronger as a wicked smile appeared on her face. "I wont have to fulfill any mission if the target is dead."

Without a sound, the woman vanished leaving not a trace except for the subtle breeze that swayed the candlelight.

* * *

"What is she Cortana?"

"I have no idea... Chief, bio-scans show her to be human. It's quite obvious that she's not though." puzzled as well Cortana was greatly enjoying this odd puzzle that had appeared before them. "Getting some strange energy readings from her, though the other three also have odd biometrics." the data she was compiling would require further study but first, to diffuse this situation. "I say we play nice until we understand what's going on, they seemed to have been fighting earlier from the damage of the surrounding area and scorch marks on that big guys armor. My predictions are that we just happened to be caught in the cross fire when we landed, I don't think that attack was meant for us." she concluded.

"I don't trust them, they could b-"

"C'mon tin man live a little! Play nice with the natives you could be stuck here for a long long time."

Startled, that was definitive to the way he was feeling... which just went to show how unusual Cortana's interruption had been. Spartans were masters of their feelings, it was rare for them too even feel the pain of a battle wound until after the mission was completed. So this, this was astounding.

"Cortana ar-"

"Listen... John, yes John... I'm not talking to the Master Chief right now. I want... no I need you too do this," realizing her blunder Cortana ran some damage control, from the suits sensors she could tell that her compatriot was suspicious of her well being. Protocol if she were rampant, she paused for a few thought cycles at the idea of what he would have to do. "We're stranded, OUTSIDE of U.N.S.C. controlled space. Hell I'm pretty sure we're even out of Covenant territory. We can't go waging a solo war against what could possibly be an entire planet."

The logic was nearly infallible.

"Just, try and be civil. For me."

"Understood." taking his finger off of the charging stud for the weapon perched on his shoulder, the Chief swung it back into place on the magnetic clamps on the back of his suit. The strangers in before him seemed to let out a simultaneous sigh of relief at the action.

Except the rude one.

"Well!" Garen, though he was a bit confused about how he could have possibly confused the voice he just heard with a woman, was the first to breach the palatable silence that followed after the behemoth before them put the weapon away. He took a cautious step forward "Allow me to properly introduce myself," he brought himself to full height, just shy of being the same as the being before them. Placing his right hand in a closed fist over his left breast plate he tilted his head down in a brief bow. "I am Garen Crownguard, Captain of the Dauntless Vanguard." raising his head once more he turned to his cohorts, "This is Luxxana," he gestured to the young blonde girl besides him who had her arms crossed over her chest giving him a haughty stare. "Crownguard, my younger sister."

"Interesting," Cortana's voice rang through the helmets internal speakers. "Seems that our new acquaintances are important."

"Maybe."

The man then gestured to the woman wearing an elaborate helmet and what seemed to be an armored feathered outfit, "This is the promising ranger Quinn." the older, though not by much from how she looked, in comparison to the younger sister nodded in greetings. "And the final member of our small group is Ahr-"

"Hello I am Ahri!"

The Chief almost shot her.

She had moved incredibly fast, far faster than possible for any normal human. One second she was standing besides her companions, the next she was literally within arms reach of him.

Nearly as fast as a Spartan.

"Where did you come from?"

Ahri was intrigued, and an intrigued Ahri was a socially awkward, and extremely... no more than that, it was more like obsessively compulsive. Yes, an interested Ahri was a socially awkward and obsessive compulsive Ahri. Her curiosity knew no bounds if she wanted to understand something.

And she wanted to understand.

THIS Spartan.

She was circling him... and he did not like it, no he did not like it at all. It was eerily similar to how wolves would stalk wounded prey. The way she was flitting from one spot to the next at speeds that should have left him dizzy, all the while rattling off questions. His gut however told him she was no threat, and he always trusted his instincts. They kept him alive through so many FUBAR operations that it was second nature to follow them at this point.

"Where are you from?"

Behind him.

"How are you so tall?"

To his left.

"Do you like puppies?"

To his right.

"What is your name?"

Right in front of him.

"Cortana what should I do?" The Master Chief, for once in his life was not sure as too what course of action he should take. She had already asked him too try and 'play nice' "What do you suggest?" it was her plan after all. He hoped that she would answer his query soon however, the odd fox girl was starting to get on his nerves because of her proximity.

"Go ahead and tell her."

The subtle stiffening of his shoulders was the only sign of how shocked he was. "Are you serious?" This would be treason, it would be a direct breach of O.N.I. protocol and it would have him if he was lucky, only a court martial. "Cortana this is in direct violation of ONI proto-"

"Protocol be damned Chief," Cortana responded she was still confused about some of the odd readings she was getting from these new individuals but she needed to convince the Master Chief that this was the best course of action. "Them knowing your name wont really matter in the long run when it comes down to it. I'll explain everything if anyone from the U.N.S.C. We need these people to trust us and from what I've observed so far this will be the best course action."

"Understood." Activating the external speakers the Chief prepared to make his first introduction using his actual name since childhood.

"Take off the helmet."

His voice caught in his throat at Cortana's request.

"What?"

"Take off the helmet, right now to them you look like a weaponized robot of some sort." Cortana explained, although she was also curious as to how these new acquaintances would react. "We want them to trust you, and don't bother telling me how many regs you're going to be breaking. I'm getting what I want one way or the other."

A small chuckle escaped his lips. "I get it Cortana," he did not like this idea, but he could understand her logic. Speaking to a faceless soldier hidden beneath armor had even been a serious issue when he was dealing with fellow U.N.S.C. Marines. Yes he was definitely not happy about doing this, "alright lets get this over with."

Reaching up with his gauntleted hands the Chief slowly removed the helmet to Mjolnir. The four people he had thus met so far on this new world he would be calling home for the foreseeable future seemed exceptionally interested in his actions. Especially the odd fox hybrid. Taking the helmet away from his head he slung it under his right arm, the fox girls eyes widened massively as she stared at him.

"My name is John."

o.o 0 o.o

* * *

"I hate you right now."

I do not really care.

"I think he is nice!"

Thank you Ahri.

"You're such a suck up foxy."

Be nice Cortana.

"What is a suck up."

"Something I bet you're really good at."

CORTANA.

"Oh c'mon! She's probably awesome at the whole dee-"

OKAY. Onto a different subject. I believe this chapter did what I needed it to do.

"You mean take up space on the internet."

Rude.

"What was Cortana trying to say earlier."

…

…

Pretend you did not hear that.

"You see Ahri some men appreciate it when you use your tongue and mouth on a certain part of their anato-"

SEE YOU NEXT CHAPTER.


End file.
